This week, we’ve mostly got new films plus one weird oldie. We’ll begin with “Black Cab,” a creepy ghost story. The indie anthology “Dating Horror Stories” warns us how things can go wrong in relationships. We’ll next move on to the silly “Carved,” which would have been a mood-setter if we’d watched it before Halloween. “Curse of the Sin Eater” made us wonder if we’d try taking the deal, and “The Funhouse” (1981) which was surprisingly forgettable.
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Mainstream Films:
2024 Black Cab
Directed by Bruce Goodison
Written by Virginia Gilbert
Stars George Bukhari, Nick Frost, Synnove Karlsen
Run Time: 1 Hour, 27 Minutes
Trailer:
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This has an interesting beginning, kind of a slog where things happen, and a pretty decent finish. The look of it is very good, and Nick Frost is great. They also mashed up a couple of horror trope ideas which tried to make things interesting but failed a bit at it. We didn’t hate it, but we were bored through too much of it.
Spoilery Synopsis
We open on a woman in white walking through the woods as the credits roll. We then see her in a car, and she appears to be pregnant– she sees ghosts outside.
Then Anne wakes up in bed, that was all just a nightmare. Patrick calls, and she’s annoyed with him, breaks up, and hangs up on him…
We cut to Anne, Patrick, and their two friends, Ryan and Jessica, having dinner out. Patrick tells a scary story, and they all get a jump scare from the waiter. Patrick announces that he’s getting married to Anne. Jessica, shocked, asks Anne if everything is all fine now, but it’s clearly not. In the restroom, she says, “He’s not going to change. Are you pregnant?” And Anne denies she is.
Everyone leaves upset, and Anne flags down a cab. Patrick just about forces her into the cab, and they drive off, leaving Jessica and Ryan behind. The driver, Ian, immediately knows something is wrong and asks Anne if she wants to throw Patrick out. Ian remembers picking up Anne at the maternity ward; she is pregnant already. Patrick is not happy with the news; Anne thinks Patrick has been cheating– with Jessica.
Anne tries to get out, but the doors are locked. Ian opens the door, Tases Patrick into unconsciousness, and then zip-ties his hands. He then ties her up, takes her phone, and pats her belly. Things have changed quickly.
The windows are tinted, and the doors are locked, so passing cars won’t be able to help them. Patrick starts to cry and then passes out again. They drive on through the rainy London streets aimlessly, or so it appears.
Ian stops on the side of an isolated stretch of road to give Anne some water and to take a pee. She sees a ghost in the mirror and screams, which annoys Ian.
Ian talks about the most haunted road in the country and about a woman who left her husband and was killed on the road there. Her daughter starved to death in the woods after. The ghost still haunts these roads, according to Ian. He tells the whole ghost story.
They stop at a gas station, and Ian goes inside for some food. Anne sees a car outside and gets ready to scream, but Ian comes back before they can yell. Anne gets more glimpses of the nasty-looking ghost woman.
Ian drives way out into the countryside, and he continues to talk about his encounter with that woman’s ghost. She spoke to him “in my head. In my thoughts,” and it’s clearly made him crazy. Was it some strange woman on the side of the road, or was it his own wife? Anne notices the same roadside sign they passed a while ago– again. Are they driving in circles?
Ian parks at an abandoned motel and he and Anne carry Patrick’s still-unconscious body inside. It looks like he spends a lot of time there; he calls his wife, but there’s no answer. He yells that she never answers!
Ian tells a story about the first time he saw the ghost and how his wife didn’t believe his story. He mistakes Anne for Elaine, his wife, so he’s clearly delusional. He then kills Patrick. Anne runs through the deserted motel, with Ian in slow pursuit.
She makes it all the way outside to the cab, but he catches and Tases her. Anne dreams of the ghost again, but this time, the ghost looks like her. Ian recaptures her and talks about Elaine wanting to get a divorce and take away his son.
Ian sees the ghost in the middle of the road and stops the car. He wants to trade Anne’s child for his own. Anne confesses that there is no child; she lost the baby at the hospital right before their first meeting. Anne yells at the ghost for stealing her baby and chases after her into the woods.
Ian leaves in the car, driving through the fog. He finally gets a phone call from Elaine which distracts him enough to hit Anne with the car by accident. Except there’s no body there. He gets back in and continues, but we see Anne’s ghost in the backseat.
Brian’s Commentary
It’s very moody and atmospheric, with all the rain and London streets. Nick Frost is both likable and lunatic here, and he’s clearly the star of the show.
It starts out really good, but at about the 45-minute mark, it really starts to drag.
I think this shows the weakness of telling a basic ghost story in a modern film. Ghosts are definitely creepy, but they’re also very, very limited as to what they can do. In this one, a dead woman appears and disappears a few times; there’s just not much scary about that. I think as moviegoers, we’re all beyond ghost stories at this point. I guess the real villain here is Ian, but we’re not completely sure whether he’s the monster or just one of the victims.
Overall, I’d say this looks really good, has a seriously creepy vibe about it, but overall, it’s just… dull.
Kevin’s Commentary
This was mostly too tame and boring. Nick Frost’s performance saved this one for me, but I still wasn’t very entertained overall. I’d give it a weak thumbs up, but just barely.
2024 Carved
Directed by Justin Harding
Written by Justin Harding, Cheryl Meyer
Stars Peyton Elizabeth Lee, Corey Fogelmanis, Carla Jiminez
Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minutes
Trailer:
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This was a bit of a send-up of horror movies from the early 1990s, with a retro vibe set in 1993. It wasn’t a spoof, but it plays off some tropes, and there’s a lot of humor in it. We had some chuckles, but the body count and horror elements are heavy too. Overall, we enjoyed it.
Spoilery Synopsis
It’s Halloween Night, 1993. We see something with tentacles picking up a knife. “It killed them. It killed them all,” says a man into his camcorder. He looks around in fear at the site of a Halloween party and the corpses strewn throughout. AJ is a reporter, and he grabs a knife to defend himself. We soon see what those tentacles can do as they tear him apart. Credits roll.
Earlier that day…
We see that AJ is there to document the Halloween recovery in town through the pumpkin fest. He talks about the recent chemical spill that killed so many people in town. Kevin and Bill, two local officials, don’t want to talk about the train derailment.
We cut to Kira, who is producing a stage play for the Halloween Pumpkin Fest. She’s got a crush on Cody, the star of the show. Trevor, her little brother, has a crush on Maddie the flute player.
Elsewhere, Earl and Clint work on their corn truck, which has broken down. Clint goes out in the field to light up and do a really bad rap dance with a scarecrow in the field. He trips over a huge rotten pumpkin. He cuts it off the stalk and carries it in the corn wagon to the pumpkinfest.
AJ interviews various people about the train derailment; Kira lost both parents. Cody announces that he’s been cast in an off-broadway production, which comes as news to Kira. They stalk off, and Shane continues the interview.
Bill fires Clint for showing up after the festival is over. Wes brings him a bunch of pot brownies and admires his twisted pumpkin. There’s a pumpkin-carving contest, and everyone brings their own pumpkins.
The pumpkin-carnage begins as everyone cuts into their pumpkins. The mutant pumpkin observes what happens to its orange brethren. It reaches up with tentacles and cuts Wes’s throat. Another guy gets beheaded and another is scalped. Things get crazy real fast since the pumpkin can walk on those tentacles as well.
The pumpkin, which we are told is female and a fruit, starts making noises. Maddie thinks it’s a mutation from the train derailment spill; “There was toxic waste everywhere.”
The group argues among themselves, and old soldier Arthur gives a rousing speech about sticking together. “Animals don’t hold grudges or have power trips,” he declares just before the creature kills him. Yeah, we saw that coming.
The group watches from their hiding place as the reporter, AJ, does what we saw in the pre-credit sequence and dies. The pumpkin throws his headless body into the power station, which knocks out the electric and phone lines.
Kevin and Bill come up with a plan to use the handheld radio to distract the pumpkin while the others get out of the tool shed. Kira comes up with a whole convoluted plan that the others have no choice but to attempt. Kevin shoots a radio way out in the field and activates it to draw the monster even further away.
Somewhere in the middle of all this running and terror, Trevor figures out that Cody is going to leave them and move to New York, so we all stop for some family melodrama. The plan continues to work until the monster spots Kevin shooting radios all over the place. When the monster goes after Kevin, Bill charges to the rescue and dies as well.
Trevor mentions Clint’s corn wagon is outside; maybe they could use it to get away. They do that, but lose Maddie in the process. Only Kira, Trevor, Cody, and Barb remain as they drive away in the truck. “We’re all going to be OK, probably,” says Barb to console Trevor. Then they find Clint, passed out in the back of the truck.
Barb watches footage on the camcorder, and she points out that the pumpkin had been targeting all the people in the pumpkin-carving contest. The last one is Trevor, so the pumpkin will be coming after him soon. Clint takes the wheel, but he’s so high they soon crash.
When Kira wakes up, Trevor is there, still unconscious. Cody is OK, but Barb is dying; the pumpkin got her. When the pumpkin comes back for more, the three survivors lay down and pretend to be dead. Clint gets up, not dead, and the pumpkin drags him off into the fields.
Kira runs to a nearby farmhouse for help, and runs into Earl, Clint’s father, who thinks she’s trespassing. She tells him about the killer pumpkin, and he just laughs. The pumpkin shows up, and he stops laughing.
As the good guys hide in the field, they see a whole bunch of little baby pumpkins, and they’re all alive as well. Both sides take hostages; a little pumpkin and Trevor.
After running into another barn, the group tricks the pumpkin into getting chewed up in the threshing machine and they all get soaked in green mutant pumpkin blood.
The sun comes up, and Trebor goes out to see the little pumpkins, but they aren’t helpless. Maddie comes to the rescue, not as dead as they thought. The four humans line up all the pumpkin babies and run over them with Earl’s tractor with much screaming. They all talk about their future, as we cut to one last baby pumpkin, hiding inside Clint’s hollowed-out head…
Brian’s Commentary
There are lots of familiar faces here, if not big stars. The monster is CGI, but it’s pretty well done overall.
It’s a sort of parody of cheesy early 90s monster movies, and it’s effective at that, poking fun of everything from no one having a cell phone to people being oblivious to closeted gays. The low-key humor definitely seems aimed at the younger crowd, but there were a few laughs from us.
The plot is basically getting from one point to another for various MacGuffins– keys, radios, a flute, and so on. Usually, each side-trip loses one of the characters. It’s formulaic, maybe a little too stretched-out, but it’s not bad.
Kevin’s Commentary
This was entertaining and old school, joining a group of characters as they fight to survive and get picked off. Who, if anyone, will survive? It’s one of those where you can’t tell for sure until the end. I liked it quite a bit.
2024 Curse of the Sin Eater
Directed by Justin Denton
Written by Adam Davis, Will Corona Pilgrim
Stars Carter Shimp, Elizabeth Laidlaw, Marcelo Wright
Run Time: 1 Hour, 30 Minutes
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
A poor guy wins the lottery by becoming the heir of a billionaire who wants to give it all to him. Which sounds like a dream until he finds out the strings that are attached. We both thought this one was quite good. It has a good cast, decent story, and realistic special effects. Would recommend it.
Spoilery Synopsis
A young man doing the best he can with what he’s got to work with, makes dinner on a tray for his mother with a side of medications. She looks crazy, especially with that gun in her hand. She shoots herself.
Three years later, Rick Malone gets up. He lives in poverty, and walks and takes the train many miles to a huge mansion. He’s late for work, and the supervisor almost fires him.
Rick gets right to work doing landscape stuff until he injures himself. He asks one of the creepy servants for assistance, and she invites him inside for first aid. He cleans himself up and tries to find the way outside but pockets some money instead.
Rick is spotted by a sickly old man who wants to talk. The servant lady wants to fire Rick and call the police, but the boss says it’s okay. The old man gives him a wad of bills and tells him to get back to work. Later, Rick and his work friend talk about what they would do with a billion dollars.
The next day, the servant woman comes out and wants to talk to Rick. Old Mr. Drayton says he has no heirs and not much time left. “If you will eat a meal off my dead body, I’ll give you everything.” He’s completely serious. Rick simply has no option but to agree.
Rick sees his ex, Tanya, at a party that Jeremy’s having at his apartment. There’s a fight, and Jeremy throws Rick across the room and threatens to kick him out. He calls everyone he knows for a job, but he’s got no offers. Jeremy offers to let him sell drugs, but Rick doesn’t want that.
Suddenly, there’s a knock at the door. A man gives Rick an invitation to Drayton’s house this evening, and he’s even brought a suit for Rick. The driver doesn’t know how old Drayton died, but he did. The servant woman is there with a whole contract, and it’s just what was promised; there’s a condition where he cannot tell anyone about the deal.
The servants bring in the meal; it’s a plate of… toast followed by some kind of gooey cake and slimy eggs and even more. At the end, he has to finish off even the leftover crumbs that they pour over the dead man’s corpse. He’s given a card to recite: “For your peace, I take on all your sins and pawn my own soul.” He then feels sick and passes out.
In the morning, Rick wakes up and runs into the servant woman, Antonette, now his servant woman. He still doesn’t quite believe that it’s all his now, but she understands that. She gives him a no-limit credit card and some suggestions on what to do next.
Rick goes to see Jeremy. He doesn’t talk about the details, but he offers his friend some money. Tanya comes by, and he’s still interested in her. He goes to an expensive bar, but the people there don’t think much of him– until the black credit card comes out.
That afternoon, Rick gets a nosebleed, and we see a creepy woman in the mirror. He has a vision where she drowns him, and in the real world, he wakes up soaking wet.
He asks Antonette what he’s gotten into, and she points out the “oath” he took. Rick has unwittingly agreed to take on Drayton’s sins so that the greedy old man could avoid Hell. “Extreme wealth carries a burden; this is what you signed up for.”
Rick goes to church and talks to the priest there. Father Eli says Rick’s just still upset about his mother’s suicide, but he does listen to Rick’s confession. Rick, however, doesn’t even know what sins he wants absolution for.
Rick confronts Antonette about the crazy ghost woman. She opens a lockbox that’s all about the case of Drayton’s wife’s murder. Rick goes back to the priest and confesses to the murder. The ghost attacks Rick, but when the priest absolves him, she vanishes.
It’s all good until more ghosts show up, and they chase him all over the house. Antonette explains that Drayton himself was a sin eater, that’s how he got his own start. She says they'll torment him for as long as he carries the burden. Drayton saw the ghosts too and eventually killed himself. Rick is just going to have to live with it, and she’ll help.
Rick overdoses and gets a vision of his dead mother. The doctor manages to revive him. Rick wonders if he could do it again as someone eats his own sins and takes over the job. He offers it to Antonette, but her contract doesn’t allow it; she suggests Jeremy.
Jeremy calls and says he’s in some kind of trouble with heavies that he got mixed up with. Rick has an envelope of cash for him. Rick gets to the torn-up apartment, sees a ghost, and then shoots it. Except it’s really Tanya, who dies from the gunshot. Rick’s driver hauls him away to cover things up.
Antonette invites Jeremy to the house, and Rick explains the process to him. Jeremy thinks thugs broke in and killed Tanya. Antonette explains the terms of the sin-eater thing to Jeremy
The doctor injects Rick with a drug that will kill him– temporarily. He expects the ghosts will then pass on Jeremy.
Rick dies again, as planned, and he sees more ghosts. They attack him but then suddenly all back off, leaving only his mother.
Rick wakes up on the table, and Antonette says Jeremy fulfilled his obligations. Rick doesn’t see any more ghosts.
Six months later, Rick’s back working construction. Antonette writes Jeremy’s name in an old book under Rick’s. There are a lot of names in the book, showing this has been going on for a very long time, and implying that Antonette may be serving a larger power than just the temporary rich guys who take the mantle. Jeremy’s not looking so hot as he now sees all the ghosts. Rick still sees Tanya, however.
Brian’s Commentary
I guess the whole question here is, “Would you do it?”
“Sin Eaters” are a long-established tradition among some cultures, but it rarely works quite like this.
Rick could have set up a trust fund or something for himself for after the procedure; I guess he wasn’t thinking too clearly.
It’s a bit predictable, but it’s good!
Kevin’s Commentary
I thought this one was all around well made. The cast of not-super-experienced folks did a great job, especially Carter Shimp in the lead role and Elizabeth Laidlaw as the kind of strange head of household. It was entertaining, and I’d recommend it.
The Funhouse (1981)
Directed by Tobe Hooper
Written by Lawrence J. Block
Stars Elizabeth Berridge, Shawn Carson, Jeanne Austin
Run Time: 1 Hour, 36 Minutes
Trailer:
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
Tobe Hooper made a career out of directing mostly horror and science fiction films, some of which are classics like “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” and “Poltergeist.” This one is a little above the middle. An early slasher film that wasn’t typical, and still isn’t. It’s got a slow start, but it’s entertaining once it gets going.
Spoilery Synopsis
We open on a kid’s bedroom, and it’s full of horror memorabilia. There’s a man in gloves, and he pulls a “slasher knife” and a Halloween mask off a display. He heads into the bathroom, where a girl is showering. It’s just Joey trying to scare his sister Amy. She vows revenge!
Amy’s father warns her not to go to the carnival, as they found two girls’ bodies there last year. Boyfriend Buzz shows up and then picks up friends Liz and Richie. They all smoke pot, except for Amy, ‘cause she’s the good girl. Meanwhile, young Joey sneaks out of his bedroom and goes to the carnival on his own.
Amy and Liz encounter a crazy old woman in the restroom, “God is watching you!” Then they see a two-headed cow and a deformed baby– this carnival is awesome! Next, they go see a magician who does an impaling trick with Liz. Then they go in and see the fortune teller. “A tall, dark stranger will enter and change your life,” she tells Amy.
Meanwhile, Joey wanders around on his own, eventually going into the funhouse. The four teens peek into the back of the “Girls Girls Girls” show.
Things start winding down for the evening, and Richie suggests they hide out and spend the night in the funhouse. Some kids did it last year, and he makes it into a dare that they can’t refuse. They ride the cars inside, but they don’t come out again. Before long, the power goes out as the carnival shuts down. Joey sees them go in and not come out, so he waits a while and then hides as well.
The four teens stay after closing and see the fortune teller talking to the guy inside the Frankenstein costume; he pays her, and she undresses. The group watches in as she pleasures him; he never takes the mask off. He finishes too soon and wants a refund, which she refuses. He kills her and messes up the electrical wiring in the place by accident.
The group tries to find a way out of the funhouse, but it’s dark and the doors are locked. “Frankenstein” brings in one of the barkers and shows him the dead fortune teller. He wants to hide the body and blame it on the locals. When the man sees the money from tonight is missing, he makes “Frankenstein” beat himself up. He eventually loses the mask, and the Frankenstein mask was way prettier than what’s underneath. He soon catches on that the four kids are watching from above.
Buzz gets Richie to admit he took the money. Outside, one of the barkers grabs Joey. The carnival barker wants the monster to “Do one more bad thing.”
As the four teens hide and talk, a noose comes out of nowhere and kills Richie. One of the barkers calls Joey’s parents to come and pick him up. Amy sees her parents out there and screams for them, but they can’t hear her.
Richie’s body soon shows up in one of the rail cars, and Liz chases after it until she falls into a trap door. The monster finds her in a ventilation system, but she stabs him. This ends up going very badly for her.
The evil barker pulls a gun on Buzz and Amy. “Just protecting my family.” They fight, and the barker ends up getting stabbed by one of his own attractions. The monster jumps in and attacks Buzz, killing him as well.
Amy is alone in the funhouse now, just her and the monster. She runs from room to room, eventually finding what’s left of Buzz and Liz. She runs to the basement, where the machines are. She ends up forcing the monster to get electrocuted and dragged between a couple of very powerful gear wheels which chew him up good.
In the morning, Amy walks out the front door.
Brian’s Commentary
Why are movie funhouses always so large? They have to be able to fit on the back of a semi-trailer. They’re always bigger on the inside. How many floors does this place have? They hid in the attic and Amy hid in the basement later.
Steven Spielberg asked Tobe Hooper to direct "E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)" but he turned it down because he was busy with this movie. Oops! At least it was good enough to later get him the job of directing “Poltergeist” (1982).
It’s not the usual slasher film; it’s just a situation that gets out of hand. Unfortunately, the first hour is really slow-moving and pretty dull. It picks up a bit toward the end, but it’s not great.
Kevin’s Commentary
Like Brian, I noticed how much bigger on the inside the funhouse was compared to the outside. It was a nice touch having Kevin Conway playing three different weird barkers. The script is decent and the practical effects hold up pretty well. It’s not a great film, but it was entertaining.
Indie Film:
2024 Dating Horror Stories
Directed by Joshua Nelson
Written by Joshua Nelson
Stars Jeff Clark Jr., Julia Wyrzuc, Noelle Cappuzzo
Run Time: 1 Hour, 24 Minutes
Trailer: <None yet. Coming in 2025>
Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone
This has a little bit of a slow start, but it’s fine once it gets going. It’s very low budget, but the stories are creative and the acting is decent. We liked it quite a bit.
Spoilery Synopsis
Three women talk about how bad dating is. They hate everything about dating. They’ve each heard some crazy dating stories. They look around at other couples and mock them one by one… Yes, this is an anthology of three short tales.
Michael the Magician is on a first date with a girl at the place where he performs. Another couple talk about the guy being a competitive eater. A third couple talks about her six-year-old– who is really a dog. She wants to go home, have sex, and then he can sleep on the couch because only the dog sleeps with her.
The competitive eater gets interrupted by his manager, and the manager doesn’t like the new girlfriend. The dog lady phones home to talk to the dog, ignoring her date.
Magic
Michael the Magnificent comes onto the stage and asks for a volunteer; he calls his date, Tara, up to assist. He puts her in a box and then stabs swords through the box. He actually cuts off her head; show’s over.
Time passes, and Michael goes on another date. Tara’s ghost appears to the new girl, Beth. Tara warns the new girl to “run.” He comes out and says he’s had lots of psycho girlfriends and one of them must have come in to talk to the new girl. Tara appears again later in the car; he’s killed many girls in his act. Sure enough, he does invite her to help him in his show.
She tells Michael about the ghost, and he works hard to gaslight her. She talks to a psychic barista, and he says it’s fine, and Michael is good for her. Tara convinces her that Michael is bad, and Tara and the other ghosts force Michael into the box. They stab and dismember him in the box.
Eater
The competitive eater inhales some ramen with his girlfriend timing him, but he’s not fast enough. He takes it all very seriously. He’s obsessed with winning, but she doesn’t quite get his fascination. Her friend, Phoenix, says he’s a bum with no financial future. “There’s something off about him.” They also talk Arnold to the psychic barista, who advises her to stick with the eater.
Lee, the eater, is a master at stick fighting, and that woman shows up; she’s not his manager after all, there’s something more going on with her. “Time is running out; are you doing this with me or not?” Emily’s friend Phoenix sees the “exotic” Valentina with him and jumps to a wrong conclusion. He says Valentina is his “Agent.”
Lee explains that Valentina wants him to get into a contest from the Dark Web that can pay a fortune if he wins. It is a competitive eating thing, but this one involves cannibalism of a freshly cut-up body. He explains this to Emily and Phoenix. When they hear that he could win $100,000, they both fall in line and give their blessing. Even Arnold approves.
It’s time for the big contest, and everyone is there for liver and kidneys. Emily and Phoenix are there cheering him on, even though they know it’s pretty weird. His opponent ate 45 eyeballs in a contest last month. The final round comes up, and it’s a tie. They’re all out of bodies, so they need a body to eat. “I’d do anything for you,” says Emily. Lee kills her so they’ll have something more to eat.
Dog
The dog-owner lady tells Rocco the dog that he has nothing to be jealous about when her boyfriend Daniel comes over. Daniel admits that he has been a fan of hers for years; she used to be a model. She complains that Rocco hasn’t been eating lately, but she doesn’t feed him dog food. She says her ex-husband was in the mob, and he got shot. He had been a hit man, and Rocco the dog got a taste for human meat. He laughs at the story until she swears it’s true.
She wants Daniel to bring her a dead body. He goes to talk to Arnold, who seems to always give the wrong advice. Daniel goes to his weird sister for help killing someone, and she’s right there, eager to help with many suggestions. She recommends an illegal or a homeless guy.
Daniel finds a homeless man digging through a dumpster. His sister gives him a gun with a silencer; she got it after she was released from the asylum. She gets annoyed at Daniel’s whining and shoots the man herself.
Daniel puts on a cleansuit and cuts up the body. He then grinds it into hamburger and prepares it as dog food for Rocco. Rocco then gobbles it right up, which pleases his owner. She kisses Daniel, who was expecting more. She also is expecting more, more bodies on a regular basis, which Daniel’s sister is more than happy to supply.
They eventually kill Arnold, who got Daniel into this mess in the first place. “He gave shitty advice,” says the sister. A cop pulls them over for passing a stop sign. The cop doesn’t live long.
Daniel breaks it off with the crazy dog lady. His face is all over the news for killing the cop. She asks him to prove his love for her, since Rocco is really, really hungry. He cuts his own throat for her.
We cut back to the three women talking about dates. “Dating is just one horror story after another…”
Brian’s Commentary
If you want good advice, stay away from mystic baristas like Arnold. If they were so wise, they wouldn’t be a barista.
The competitive cannibalism story was hilarious and well done. The dog story was good as well. The magician story was predictable and not so interesting, and it’s unfortunate that it was the first of the stories; we almost dropped out as that one progressed. We stuck with it, and it picked up quite a bit with the next two segments.
It’s clearly shot, the dialogue is good, and the stories are paced well. At times, the music is a bit overbearing, but only in a few scenes.
It’s pretty good once it gets going.
Kevin’s Commentary
The second two stories were definitely better than the first, and I’m glad that we stuck through it. I thought it was a decent anthology overall with enough to make it worth the watch.
Short Films:
2024 Short Film: Stinky Girls
Directed by Adam White
Written by Kelsey Sullivan
Stars Jackie Romankow, Michelle Moriarty
Run Time: 8:06
Watch it:
What Happens
Two girls having a sleepover compare gross things that they’ve both done. One girl talks about a big mess she made. The other girl then talks about throwing up. Instead of going to the toilet, Marjorie hides puke in the corners of the house, like a dog. Then, they start talking about sticking themselves with pins. The stories get crazier and crazier; these girls have some real problems…
Commentary
It’s all fun and games until someone loses an organ. I suppose most girls’ sleepovers are like this, but I’ve obviously never been invited to one. Now I know what I missed out on.
This is well-written and nicely shot. They’re both having such a good time, no matter how twisted it all gets. Sometimes you’re lucky enough to find a soulmate. They are, in fact, “Stinky Girls.”
2024 Short Film: Don’t Feed the Cat
Directed by J Zachary Thurman
Written by J Zachary Thurman
Stars Ryan Lucy, Tara Brown
Run Time: 6:54
What Happens
Chloe goes to her grandfather’s house to pack his clothes. He’s got Alzheimer’s and is staying at the hospital now. She finds that his house is a disgusting mess, but he left her a short list of chores to do. Number three on the list is “Don’t Feed the Cat.” Except her grandfather doesn’t own a cat, does he?
Commentary
The film is a little too dark, better lighting would have been good. Still, the story is short and well edited. There’s only one character, and she does a fine job. The ending works well, and I was left wondering what the real story was here when it was all over. So yeah, it’s good!
2023 Short Film: Ohio
Directed by Alexanderthetitan
Written by Denli Chavez
Stars Emma Laird, Payton Grufik, Daria Soldatova, Kyle Christiansen
Run Time: 8:02
Watch it:
What Happens
Two girls walk through a parking lot in Ohio and begin to talk about the serial killer who’s been stalking the area and stabbing people with a screwdriver. One girl knows all about it, but the other was clueless. They split up, and the girl who hadn’t heard finishes walking through the dark parking lot alone. Stan calls, he’s on the way to pick her up, but he’s late, and she’s frustrated.
A strange man stops his car next to her, and he’s very odd. What could go wrong?
Commentary
But really, we all hate Virgos, don’t we?
It’s all filmed outdoors, at night, and everything is completely visible. Bravo! On the other hand, I was expecting more of a twist– everything here is exactly what it seems. I’m also not clear on what makes this “Ohio” and not any other random parking lot.
It’s well made, but I’m left wanting more information.
2023 Short Film: Oddities
Directed by Tyler D Savage
Written by Tyler D Savage
Stars Ariela Barer, Logan Miller, Adrienne Barbeau
Run Time: 14:31
Watch it:
What Happens
A young couple decides to steal an antique mirror from a curiosities shop. The old woman who runs the place seems pretty oblivious to what’s going on, and the mirror is way in the back, out of sight of everyone. He heads to the back while she stays up front to distract the shopkeeper. Seems easy enough, right?
Commentary
Adrienne Barbeau here proves the saying, “You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain,” and she’s quite good as the shopkeeper here. The young couple have problems, drug addiction being one of them, but they’re completely believable as mildly inept robbers.
The special effects toward the end are really well done, and I had no idea what to expect from this one. Excellent! It was like a miniature movie.
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